


Love Me Like You Don't

by meghanisadweeb (orphan_account)



Series: Sunflower [2]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Anal Sex, BDSM, Consensual Non-Consent, M/M, Rape Fantasy, Rape Roleplay, Sexual Roleplay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-29
Updated: 2017-10-29
Packaged: 2019-01-26 09:25:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12554360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/meghanisadweeb
Summary: Thomas has a fantasy that makes him feel more than a little guilty, and Pip is done with his angsty bullshit.





	Love Me Like You Don't

He knows how much his partner likes his glasses, so out with his contacts and on with his bifocals. He's forty four and he already wears bifocals. Goddamn, he feels old. He's not sure how Pip would want him to dress, so he picks out a cardigan and button down. Nothing fancy. He doesn't feel like he should wear a suit to a picnic date.

 

The jeans that he ends up picking out for Philip fit him like a second skin. He loves the way that his ass looks in them. He carries the bundle of clothes to the bathroom, knocking on the door. "I'm just gonna leave your clothes out here, alright?"

 

When Thomas comes to the bathroom with his clothes, Pip is quick to answer. “Sorry, I’m here!” He pauses at the sight of Thomas. “Damn you look good... tonight’s gonna be fun for sure.” He giggles, reaching out for his clothes with a smile. “Thanks, daddy..” He smirks, closing the door with a playful grin.

 

Thomas laughs to himself when Pip closes the door on him so quickly and decides to pull out his phone to pass the time. 

 

Pip is out in a few minutes, smiling as he straightens the button up that seems a bit too big for his delicate shoulders even though it was his size. It hangs partway down his thighs, tight skinny jeans underneath. “I look fucking adorable.”

 

"Damn, baby girl. You look- wow." Thomas murmurs, turning to his partner. He looks so tiny. His clothes never fit him quite right, always too large in the same places. But the way that they hang off of his already-small frame? It's cute as fuck. Honestly, Thomas is a fan of the look. "If we weren't already engaged, I'd probably be tripping over myself and begging for your number. Holy shit, sweetie. C'mere." He beckons Philip towards him and traps him in a hug. He smiles brightly, leaning down to capture his lips in a kiss.

 

Philip grins, smiling up to Thomas. “You think? This shirt’s really comfy, I should wear these more often.” It’s some super soft cotton blend Thomas probably spent way too much money on. “And it’s good thing we’re engaged because I’d probably never get the nerve to text someone as attractive as you.”

"I'm glad that you like that shirt because it cost me an arm and a leg." Thomas grins, running his hand over the soft fabric. Yeah. It was totally worth every dime he spent. But everything that he bought Pip was worth every dime.

 

Pip pulls his hair back, tying it into a loose ponytail. “C’mon, we’ve gotta go shopping for... food stuff? I dunno, maybe we could get some sandwich things.” He snorts. “When should I go into character though? Is the shopping part of our cute, romantic date? Or nah?”

 

"Hmm? Oh, I'm not sure. I feel like the longer I have to immerse myself in character the better. Despite the fact that I can speak very flow-ily, I'm no actor."

 

“Mmh... okay, then.. as soon as we’re in your car, I’m in character, okay? It’ll take me a few minutes to really get into it, but just bear with me on it. You’ve picked me up from my apartment.. and we’re going to the store to get our food and then we go on the rest of our date...” Philip says softly. 

 

“I met you on a dating site that’s meant to find older men partners... my account mentions I don’t like having sex on the first couple dates, but I’m sure you’ve looked over that.” By the end Philip’s voice is low, biting his lip. 

 

He pulls back, giggling a little. “C’mon, we should go!”

 

"Alright, alright, baby. I'm comin'." He lets himself be pulled to the car, practically vibrating with excitement. He'd done something similar to this with Laf once, but he was, of course, on the other end. It hadn't been this elaborate, either.

 

"So, um, Philip, was it?" He does something with his voice that makes it sound rougher, lets his accent work its magic. "Thomas Jefferson, but you can call me Thomas. Or Daddy." He snorts, leaning back in his seat. He sounds ridiculous.

 

Philip is silent for a few moments, taking a couple deep breaths. He’s never been in this car before. He’s never met Thomas before. He’s been texting him for a few and now they were finally getting together... focus. 

 

Pip couldn’t help the sharp laugh that left him at the daddy joke, covering his mouth quickly. God, if he didn’t want to fuck that voice of Thomas's, this is the whole fucking reason he’s going to marry- wait. No. Keep in character.

 

“Um, yes. Or Pip, if you prefer just the single syllable.” He smiles, fidgeting with his fingers in such a way that he looks a bit anxious. “So.. you said in your text we’d have to stop at the store first?” He lets out a shaky breath. “God- I’ve never done this whole, uh.. finding dates online, sorry, I’m just a bit nervous.” He says with an awkward grin, chewing on his bottom lip softly.

 

"So, Pip, then?" Thomas murmurs, looking over with a gaze that's nothing short of predatory. "Hey, don't be nervous. This is my first time doing something like this, too." His character is lying through his teeth. He'd probably be the kind of guy that says shit like that to seem more relatable or whatever.

 

Philip looks over to nod to the other, but he can’t help the shudder that goes up his back at the sight. Fuck, that look would be the death of him. He giggled nervously. “Really? You seem to have a lot of practice with this whole thing... with the way you talked.” He could imagine it, naughty sex jokes and occasional partial nudes as Thomas tried to get them in return. Pip probably had a drunk night where he sent at least a dozen photos of him undressing and maybe a video of him jacking off. Something he’d regret like that..

 

"And, anyway, you're way too pretty to be nervous." With that, he drives off, pulling into the parking lot of a random Walmart. Once he's unbuckled his seatbelt and made his way to the passenger's side, he opens the door for his partner- No. This random stranger that he's on his first date with.

 

"What kind of deli meat do you eat? I'm a turkey guy myself. Any food allergies that I should know about?" He smiles once they're inside and grabs a basket. He can see it now, pressuring or straight up forcing this sweet thing in front of him into something that he's dead set against doing. It sends a shiver through him that he can't contain.

 

He got out of the car when they arrived, humming softly. “Mmh... chicken or turkey, I don’t really like ham or.. well, I don’t like red meat in general.” He shrugged, biting his lip. “I’m not really allergic to anything? I get headaches when I eat nut butters though.. that’s it.”

 

He takes a pack of turkey and haphazardly tosses it in the basket. "What kind of cheese do you prefer?" He wonders idly if he could talk Pip into eating something that he wouldn't like, just to please him. When they're having sex normally, he's always so eager. God, he really wants to crush a tantrum tonight. The struggle, followed by eventual submission? Nothing gets him off quite like taming his boy's spirit.

 

“I- um.. sharp cheddar.. or Swiss I guess. I- I don’t care really, as long as it’s not fucking American cheese. That shit makes me want to choke.” His voice was innocent enough, but he knew the words could be used against him. Fuck it though, that was the point.

 

He takes a package of Kraft American off the shelf without so much as a sideways glance to Philip. He wanders about a little more, picking up a proper picnic basket while he's walking. He takes a tub of pre-cut watermelon, a couple of apples, a tub of macaroni salad, stuff like that. Basic picnic food. 

 

Philip follows Thomas closely, frowning when he grabs the cheese. “I told you I didn’t like....” He stops himself, glancing away anxiously. When they’re finished he smiles, nodding a little. “God.. I can’t wait, I’m so hungry. I didn’t get a chance to get a proper lunch today because of my class schedule and just.. um, yeah. I’m really hungry.” He rambles excitedly, but then forces himself to stop, looking over at Thomas with a small smile. Be cute. Be sexy. Make him want nothing more than to wreck his ass. Pip can do that. He knows he can.

 

"I think that we're just about done. Is there anything else you can think of, baby?" The nickname sounds more mocking than usual, but it's subtle. Thomas suddenly feels huge and powerful. It's extremely arousing.

 

After making sure they're in a fairly secluded spot, Thomas reaches down and touches Philip so lightly he might be able to pass it off as an accident. "All those pretty pictures that you sent me? I'm excited to see how the real deal holds up."    
  
Pip’s cheeks flush, taking a shaky breath when Thomas's fingers brushed him  _ down there _ . “Those- those were an accident. I was drunk- I- I told you to delete them.” He whines softly, looking down at his shoes. 

 

"Yeah, yeah. I know, and I did. It's just hard for me to forget what you look like, with how pretty you are. All those freckles. You shouldn't have been drinking, though. None of that from now on. You're not allowed, especially since you're underage. You understand me?" Thomas's character totally kept the pictures. He'd probably bring them up later when they're fucking. Threaten to share them if he didn't do what he wanted. Fuck.

 

“I didn’t mean to! It was just.. I was with my friends and they told me a cup or two wouldn’t hurt and I dunno...” Then a couple shots of vodka and fucking a few of his friends, he was left in the bathroom by himself to do as he pleased. “And that fucking video... ugh, I can’t believe myself. I shouldn’t have said those things about... you and um.. what I “wanted”.” He could imagine it. Begging to be fucked as he took a video of him fucking himself on his fingers, crying out Thomas's name as came all over his stomach. 

 

"You're not allowed to drink. Do I make myself clear?" Thomas says firmly, clenching his fists. He seriously hopes that he looks intimidating and not like some dude trying to be intimidating. "If we're going to do this, you're going to follow my rules. And if you send people slutty pictures when you're drunk, I don't want you drinking."

 

When Thomas raises his voice, blood rushes to Pip’s cock so fast that he almost feels dizzy. Thank god his shirt is mostly covering his crotch right now or the bulge that that’s forming would be so fucking obvious. “You can’t tell me if I can drink or not, Thomas.” He mumbles softly, deciding to bitch a little. He really wants to piss him off, make him mad to the point where he has to fuck him. “I only sent those pictures to you anyways... it’s not like I’d send them to just anybody, especially not with those captions.” 

 

"Yeah, but I can, though." Thomas hums, tapping his fingers on his thigh. 

 

He keeps one arm tight around Philip's waist the entire time he's paying for their shit, and only lets go of it to pack the basket when they get to the car. "Are you clean?" He knows the answer. They both got tested together months ago. Thomas had lost his papers and wanted to go again just so that Pip didn't have to take his word for it. They're both squeaky clean. He wants to raw that sweet ass of his baby's until the only thing he can remember is Thomas's name.

 

Pip looks confused. “Wh-why does that matter? It’s not like we’re going to do anything? B-but I am clean...” He says softly, looking away. 

 

"And what do you like? In bed, I mean?" He hasn't asked Philip a single personal question beyond sex, a voice in his head reminds him. He hopes that he's doing this whole sexually-charged asshole thing right.

 

“I- I don’t think that’s really important right now? I told you I don’t like fucking on the first date...” He says softly, sitting down carefully. He made sure to spread his legs apart a little extra for Thomas... invite him to try something.

  
  


When Pip starts bitching about not wanting to fuck, Thomas frowns. He starts formulating a response in his head, doing his best to sound like as much of an asshole as he can.

 

"Who's to say that we won't? Honestly, how do you expect to pay me back for this if we aren't going to have sex? And, really, I'd just be taking what's rightfully mine. I see something in you, Philip. You need to be helped through life. You need to be guided by someone with a firm hand. I think that I could do that for you." He hums a tune under his breath and turns on the radio.

 

“You see something in me..?” He asks, glancing over with wide eyes. Oh god, he’s turned on. His cock feels so hard inside these jeans, pressing against the zip in a desperate attempt to get free. And he feels so empty- god, he just wants that thick cock fucking him as hard as possible.

 

Thomas lets one hand sneak into Pip's lap, resting heavily on his crotch. His. To own and use and discard. "That's why I picked you, y'know. You look so damn submissive. You'd probably look so pretty when you cry."

 

Pip almost breaks character to start begging, but he manages well, letting out a small squeak as his hips bucked softly. “I believe you’re mistaken.” He says suddenly, pushing Thomas's hand off. “I don’t want... I don’t want to fuck you tonight, okay? I-I’m sorry, maybe... maybe next time, but I  _ don’t _ fuck on the first night. I just don’t, Thomas.” His voice is firm as he crosses his legs nervously. “And I’m..I’m not even a sub, I usually top...” God damn, that was a lie that would send him to hell.

 

"You're so... submissive. I don't quite know how to explain it. You're cute as a goddamn button, and that only adds to your whole shy virgin thing. It's hot. And you're so nervous and scared about everything. Clearly, you need someone to guide you. To dominate you in all the aspects of your life." Thomas smiles, but it's almost malicious. When his hand gets pushed away, he doesn't miss a beat before replacing it. 

 

"I really don't think that I’m even close to mistaken. And how is it fair for you to decide what I do or don't do with what's mine? You've been mine since I laid eyes on you that first time. And I'm keeping you." He squeezes Pip's dick, hard. "I don't usually keep toys, but they've never been as pretty as you before. And, God, I can't wait to fuck you. You're probably tight as a virgin. Damn. I could take care of you so well, y'know. Pay off your student loans, stock your wardrobe, take you on trips..." He can see it now. His character luring pretty young boys in with promises of lavish lifestyles and cars and tuition and being taken care of, only to block their numbers and never talk to them again after they fuck. What he could have easily done to Philip on their real first date. He snorts at his next comment.

 

“I’m not a virgin,” Pip says sharply, but is unable to stop the moan that leaves him when Thomas squeezes him. It almost hurts, but god is he into it. 

 

"You're not a sub like I'm a cactus. You'd look so pretty with a collar around your neck, tied down to my bed. You'd be completely at my mercy. Based on what your dick is telling me, you're very much a sub."

 

“I said, I don’t have sex on the first date, and I’m not your fucking sub!” Philip cries, shoving Thomas's hand away and crossing his legs. “I want to enjoy dinner with you, Thomas, but if you try shit one more time I’m getting out of this fucking car, do you understand?” He’s just going to have to try again once they were at the park. 

 

When they get there, Philip had calmed down a little, humming softly as he gets out of the car. “Just food okay? Just a nice dinner with someone you like, it doesn’t have to be physical.” Though he’s sure Thomas is going to be all over him before he can even think about making his sandwich.

 

Thomas guides Pip down by the pond, where there are clusters of bushes hanging around. With a hand on the boy's shoulder he walks to an enclosed space about the size of a king-sized bed. Fairy lights were wrapped wound some of the bushes. "The lights didn't used to be here. Must be new." He mumbles, mostly to himself. There's already a blanket laid down on the ground. He digs around in one of the bushes and pulls out a bottle of lube. 

 

"Common courtesy. People leave 'em here." He winks, arranging their basket in the little enclosure and helping Philip in.

 

Philip sits down slowly, looking around with a hum. “Oh? Well, we don’t need that here... since we’re not...” He trails off with a nervous smile, biting his lip. 

 

Dinner with a couple kisses.. he pauses. “Do you like kissing? I- I like kissing.. a lot. I wouldn’t mind it if that’ll make up for not having sex?” He asks hopefully, reaching for the basket next excitedly. God, he’s so hungry, even if he did have a raging erection he still needed food.

 

Thomas smiles and kisses Pip, hard. It only takes a couple of seconds before his hands start to roam just a little more than he intended for them to. He looks down at his lap in an act of fake-bashfulness and bites his lip. "Sorry." He mumbles, but he does lean in for another. This time, though, he doesn't stop himself.

 

Phillip moans against Thomas's mouth softly, kissing him back with a quiet whine. “It’s okay just-“

 

Thomas finds himself fumbling with Philip's pants before he knows it, grinning up at him. "Come on. I want these off, right now. Wanna see what I'm gonna be fucking before I fuck it, in person. I've been dying to stick my dick in that cute fucking ass of yours."

 

He gets cut off by Thomas's lips again, running his hands up the other's chest. “I-I’m not sure... I don’t really know if I’d want..that. Can’t you wait a little bit?”

 

"Fine. If you're not gonna cooperate, then I'll do it myself." Thomas manages to get his jeans down, but it's a little bit of a struggle. "See? I can see how much you want this, no matter what you say. Look at how hard you are." He tugs Philip's underwear, discarding them somewhere he can't see.

 

“Thomas!” Pip cries, trying to cover up himself and failing. “I-I’m not. I don’t want this..!” He whimpers, breathing heavily. 

 

"Oh, aren't you pretty. I want you to beg me for it." Thomas murmurs, running his hands up and down Pip's thighs. "And don't hold back your tears. I want to see you cry for me."

 

“No, I’m not going to fucking beg for something, I don’t want!” Philip says, shoving Thomas off and feeling around for his boxers. “I’m going home- fuck you.” He snaps, wiping his eyes with his sleeve gently.

 

"Fine. We can do this the hard way." Thomas all but growls, pinning Pip down by his shoulders. "The thing about me is that I always get what I want. Always. And I want you. So, you can be a good boy and let me use you, or I can make this hurt. What's it gonna be, baby?" He nibbles on Philip's collarbone lightly, grasping his dick with an iron grip.

 

"And I was gonna love you so sweetly, too. They say Virginia is for lovers. I would have made you feel good with lots of kisses and love and it would have been amazing.” He unbuttons the boy’s shirt with a small smirk.

 

Philip’s eyes widen and he looks up at Thomas. Tears start to well in his eyes, breathing picking up speed. “I want to make you happy I j-just don’t want this right away..!” He cries, moaning softly when he feels the light bites. 

 

“Th-Thomas...” His body goes slack, unable to find the strength to keep fighting. “I don’t... I don’t want..” He says quietly, back arching into the other’s touch instinctively with a soft groan.

 

"Has it occurred to you that maybe I don't care about what you want? It's always the pretty ones without a drop of brain, isn't it? Nice and pretty with a cute little body and not a damn thought in their head about anything other than dick." Thomas chuckles darkly, unbuttoning his pants.

 

"What's your color, angel? Is this okay? Am I pushing it too far?" He breaks character completely for just a second. He needs to check in.

 

When Thomas breaks character, Pip lets out a relieved breath of air. “Oh god- yellow-green? I n-need a moment.” He gasps out shakily, hands trembling. “It’s so fucking intense.. but I love it.” He moans quietly, reaching down for Thomas's pants. “C’mon..! I’m having so much fun, please continue.” Break was over.

 

"God, you're getting me so hard right now. All splayed out and helpless underneath me. I could do literally anything to you and you'd just have to take it. Come on, the faster that you cry, the faster I'm gonna fuck you. And the faster I get off, the sooner we can eat and get home so that I can  _ really _ teach you who you belong to." Thomas slides a finger, dry, past Pip's rim.

 

Philip shakes his head weakly when Thomas urged him to cry, tears leaking from the corner of his eyes. “No..!” He begs quietly, closing his eyes tightly. 

 

As Thomas pushes his finger in, Pip whines sharply, biting his lip. “St-stop..!” A small sob breaks through as tears start to flow freely. “I don’t- nnh..” His finger brushed past Pip’s prostate, and the boy’s hips bucked suddenly. “Fuck- please, no.” He says again, even though his hips roll down, desperately trying to get some more friction. He fucking needs this shit because  _ dear God _ is it hot.

 

“Goddamn, you’re so beautiful when you cry. You look so fuckin’ wrecked.” Thomas groans, deciding that Pip is still stretched out enough from earlier that he could fuck him without any more prep. He bottoms out with a guttural moan, fucking him faster than he’s ever done before.

 

Philip gasps as Thomas pushed inside him, eyes rolling back with a stifled moan. Fuck. Fucking hell. 

  
“Gonna take you home and you’re gonna be my toy. After I train you up a bit, start to teach you your place, I could probably get you to cry on command. All that you’ll ever know is being a fucktoy.” He grumbles in between thrusts.

 

Each thrust has Pip reeling, closing his eyes tightly as he rocked his hips in rhythm. It hurts a little, but the pleasure is a hell of a lot stronger than the pain of being taken dry. 

 

It doesn’t take long for Pip to come, crying out softly as stars cross his vision. “F-fuck..!” He sobs, then relaxes, breathing shakily. Character broken, he reaches up, pulling Thomas down into a kiss. “Thank you..”

 

"Thank you for what? I should be the one thanking you for indulging in my creepy-ass fantasies every single time without fail. I think that you'd do just about anything I asked, and you have no clue how terrifying that is. You can say no to me, you know that, right? You don't have to do whatever I want just because you're usually the submissive one." Thomas flops down next to Philip once he's come, burying his face in his freckled chest. 

 

"But I mean what I said. You do look really pretty when you’re crying for me. I would never hurt you. You do realize that? I just… I can hardly stand the fact that I got off on pretending to rape you. I guess it’s the whole thing that my therapist asks every single time that I go and see her? If i’ve ever thought about hurting someone the same way that I was hurt. And I guess that this stuff is how I channel that. I’d never actually go out and hurt someone… But when I know that it’s you, and that you’re consenting, it’s almost like I can just get it all out? His voice is quiet as he runs his fingers through Philip’s hair, pulling it from its ponytail.

 

“I mean, it’s not that bad. A lot of people have fantasies of being pressured into sex or even raped, I’m just glad we satisfied that fantasy between ourselves.” Pip says a bit breathlessly, smiling a little up at the sky.  “Don’t be a sappy bitch, Thomas. I know I can say no. I used my colours. I needed a small break, I used yellow. If I wasn’t comfortable with the idea I would’ve told you.. but I had no reason to say no to something that I’ve wanted to do for a while.” He hums softly, tilting his head into Thomas's touch. 

 

"I know, I know. But I'll have  _ you  _ know that I'm the sappiest of bitches. But sometimes I get nervous about the fact that we're not exactly on equal footing in this relationship. The age gap and the income inequality and it's all very, very bad for our power dynamic. I don't want you to feel like you have to do things just because I suggest them." Thomas is, inexplicably, spilling his guts here. Every single one of the beans. He's absolutely terrified that Pip only has sex with him because he thinks that he has to or else he'd be out on the street.

 

“Thomas..” Pip groans softly, covering his eyes with his arm tiredly. “I’d say no, okay? I’d let you know if I wasn’t comfortable, I promise.” He mumbles, pulling his arm back so he could rub Thomas's shoulder gently. 

 

Pip listens to Thomas closely, nodding a little. “Mhm..” He glances over. “I really loved it honestly. George always liked the idea of doing something similar but I never liked it, especially when he tried to force me to like it. I like it with you though. I liked it a lot.”

 

Thomas's stomach drops at that fucking name. The name of the guy that actually  _ did  _ rape his baby girl. "Please,  _ please _ don't compare me to Eacker like that. He was a sack of shit that abused you and I don't want to feel like we're on the same level of anything in any aspect. We aren't, are we?" 

 

“I-I’m not, that’s not what I’m trying to do, I swear.” He stammers out, taking Thomas's hand. “I just... I want you to know how much more comfortable I am. I’ve never been like this with a person before, this comfortable. George’s got nothin’ on you, I promise.” He laughs a little nervously, kissing Thomas's temple.

 

"Hey, you don't have to be nervous. I'm not blaming you. And I'm really glad that you're so comfortable around me. It's pretty obvious by the fact that we're here that I feel the same way. I love you. I love being with you." Thomas says, propping himself up with one arm so that he can lean down and press a kiss to Philip's lips. "Pretty." He smiles, laying back down.

 

"Okay, we acted out one of  _ my _ fantasies. What's one of yours? Like, the weirdest one that you can think of?"

 

“I...” Fantasies? “Uh.. I don’t really know. Maybe, um.. I like the idea of you getting jealous over me, like really jealous. Like... like kissing me in public and holding me real tightly. And then when we get home you could... y’know. Or- or, well...” He shifts a bit awkwardly. “Would it be too weird to want to do like a.. a teacher-student thing? You look so good in your glasses and when you say all that smart shit sometimes I just kinda... wonder a bit I guess.” It was probably strange to Thomas...

 

"Like, possessive jealous? Or just really jealous? Because you know how possessive I can be. And it's reasonable, too. You're too damn beautiful for your own good. I have to keep my eye on other people or they might think that they're allowed to sneak into your perfect lil' heart." He raises an eyebrow at the next idea, but he's not exactly turned off. If it weren't so painful, he'd be hard again right now.

 

"No, that would absolutely  _ not  _ be so weird. You, wearin' a cute little skirt and mary janes? Bending over my desk and begging for it? Holy  _ hell _ . I have an idea of what we're gonna be doing tomorrow. But first, we should probably eat, 'cause sundown's gonna be soon." He sits up and gestures to the basket.

  
  



End file.
